


understand and turn around

by bogfenwetland



Category: The Haunting of Hill House (TV 2018)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 04:04:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16468346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bogfenwetland/pseuds/bogfenwetland
Summary: theo is scared of her mom and theo is scared of herself





	understand and turn around

**Author's Note:**

> i really love theo crain! i wanted to look into her relationship with luke a little.

“Do you remember what I told you, two years ago? It was your birthday, Theo. And you were angry at Luke because he took that VHS tape you watched on repeat, of Madonna in concert. Do you remember what I’m talking about?” Mom looks at you with her piercing eyes as she speaks. You keep your gaze down and to the left, where you look when you’re uncomfortable.

“No,” you mumble, pulling at the glove on your left hand with your right. They’re the brown ones that round off at the wrist, faux leather. Mom is staring at you, you know it. She’s screeching, her mouth falling open at the hinges and her hands coming up to pull at the roots of her hair. She’s closer to your face than your own nose is, bearing down on you with her breath heaving--

You make eye contact with her. She’s standing across the room, looking at you silently.

“Well, Theodora. It’s okay that you didn’t listen. I can tell you again.” She’s smiling slightly. You have no idea if she’s angry or not. Your body shivers. 

“See, you yelled at Luke for borrowing something of yours without permission. You called him greedy. He was only four, he didn’t understand you. So you took his glasses to show him how it felt, and he started crying, and I told you something, Theo. Something really important. So please hear me this time: sometimes, people need something that belongs to you more than you need it yourself, do you know what I mean?” she asks, walking towards you with her arm extended. She wraps her fingers around your right hand. Your eyes twitch, but your body stays still.

“Why would Luke need that tape more than me? Why would I need his glasses more than he needs them?” you ask. Mom’s eyes look thin, her hair wiry. You watch her face soften against her eyes as you talk, a light yellow glow surrounding her. 

“Not those things specifically, Theo. But when you’re older, there will be things Luke will need from you that you won’t want to give him. You’ll be angry with him, you’ll be feeling like he’s robbing you blind. You’ll know that he won’t choose to do the right thing, that he’ll take the money from your wallet when you see him on Christmas and when you confront him about it he’ll act like he doesn’t even know you own a purse,” she says, slowly becoming more emotional as she speaks. You step back, letting go of her hands. Her grip had tightened.

“Mom, what are you--” 

“He’ll use your money to pump his blood full of poison because he’s young and doesn’t know anything at all. Theo, it’s your fault that he’s killing himself. Theo, you have to help him! Give him everything you can, please! Please!” she’s crying as she speaks, her words coming out quickly and frantically. 

“Mom! Please, what are you-- what’s happening? What are you talking about? Poison?” you’re crying too, stepping further away. Your ankles hit the staircase. 

Mom sinks to her knees, sobbing. Screaming. She’s yelling,  _ save him save him save him _ . Your hands are at your side, fingers flexed in confusion. In fear. You are afraid of your mom. She grabs at her chest and her throat, scratching her skin as she cries. 

“Olivia, Jesus!” Your father yells, running in from the library.  

“Hey, come on, what happened?” He asks, hurriedly, one hand on her back and the other grabbing at her hands as he kneels before her. “Liv, hey! Look at me! Theo, go to your room.” He’s looking at you with rage in his eyes. He thinks this is your fault. This is your fault. 

“Dad, I-- I’m sorry! I don’t know why she’s-- I didn’t mean to make her--”

“Go! Go to your room!” he screams.

You stare a little longer, your mouth moving and stuttering. You can’t think of what to say. You turn and sprint up the stairs, passing Luke and Nell crouched in the hallway, clearly eavesdropping. 

“Theo,” Luke lisps out, “what happened?” 

You stop dead in your tracks, turning to face them. Nell has her arm around Luke, sitting on her knees. Her other hand is scratching at her chest. Luke’s eyes are watering under his glasses. You wish he wasn’t scared. Luke’s eyes are watering in the hospital lights. You wish he wasn’t scared. He smiles at you shakily. 

“Theo, hey, I-- I’m sorry, man.” He’s shivering so much he’s almost convulsing. “I-- you know, I was meaning to call you. I guess it’s-- it’s good we got to meet.”

You reach out to him, bare, slender fingers touching his arm. You recoil instantly. The taste of soap enters your mouth, you feel your heart beat thirstily. You pull a long black glove back on tightly over your wrist.

“Luke.” 

“Y--Yeah?”

“Don’t fucking come to me for anything else, okay?”

“Theo…” 

You walk away.

“Theo, hey! Come on! D--Don’t go, man! I’m-- hey!” his voice fades as the receptionist’s phone rings in the hall. You savor the sounds of the sliding doors, feeling unreal until you grip the handle of your car door. 

“Theo, let go!” Luke cries out. You jump back, watching as he rubs his arm. Nell’s hands are bunched into little fists.

“Oh, shit. I’m sorry, Luke. I-- I don’t know what’s…” you trail off. Your siblings are looking at you with heavy fear in their eyes. 

“Go away, Theo!” Nell yells at you angrily as Luke cries, shrinking away from you as you try to reach back out to him. You’re left stuttering again, tears welling up in your eyes. They roll down your cheeks quickly. Your ears are ringing. You turn again, running away. You feel afraid, you feel hurt, you feel guilty, like a monster.

You swing the door to your dance studio open, letting it slam shut behind you. 


End file.
